reached my lowest weight and a bmi of 15. my bones disgusted me and my family were crying. decided to recover. now maybe i’m relapsing, or maybe i just realised that i was wrong and my bones were always beautiful, they were too beautiful and it frightened me. so beautiful. oh god, take me back. now god knows what i weigh but i can’t see them any more. all i can see is this huge stomach swelling out like bad spot, but worse because i can’t pop it.
i’m back. and i’m hoping my eating disorder will consume me so i will never consume again.
switching on your computer before you make yourself food so by the time you come back your computer is turned on and waiting for you like a naked lover